Thursday, June 14, 2012
It's my 15th Anniversary College Reunion This Weekend and I'm Not There
I've been seeing my former classmates post about heading to the Re-U (or being at the Re-U) today and it's weirding me out. Mostly thought it's making me sad.
This is not because I want to be there. I'm pretty sure it's the kind of thing that would Not Work Out For Me (flashback to first night at Carleton with all the new students. Me talking awkwardly with an an incoming Junior in Sayles while the men's track team streaks. Me going back to dorm room to write letters to high school friends soon after.) Some people do well at big gatherings. I am not one of them. I am one of those people who hates weddings. This would just be like a giant wedding party-sans bridal couple.
I'm sad because I remember working over the summer during reunions with some of the people who are there this weekend. I remember one friend of mine ignoring alums smoking pot in the men's room in Sayles* and another having to bust skinny dipping alums in one of the pools (my summer job was security.) One of my friends said "well my boss said that if you see alums shooting up on the stirs of Sayles you should ignore them."
I remember wondering why the fuck respectable adults who could afford hotel rooms would want to come and spend a few nights sleeping in Burton--which was not only un-air-conditioned but the heat was on in the summer.
Paired with this is my remembrance of working Security on Graduation day my junior year and helping to kick all the graduates out on graduation day (and locking up after them) and a year later being kicked out myself. "A diploma is an eviction notice written in Latin." I remember how much leaving Carleton really hurt.
When I went back to visit a few years later I was talking with a friend of mind who settled in the Cities. He was saying how he went back to Carleton to visit often. I asked "Isrn't it weird to go into Sayles Hill and not have a mailbox that's yours?" He answered "I don't go into Sayles much."
Maybe I'm just depressed that me and my friends have become the alums. Maybe I'm sad because I know that going back to a reunion would probably not work for me the way it appears to be working for my facebook friends. Maybe I'm just envious because they'll be drinking Standup Falldowns** and skinny dipping in Boliou fountain while I'm at home doing homework.
But I'll get over it. I'll go to the beach tomorrow. And besides I know another Carl who lives in Beverly who's not at the Re-U this weekend. *thinking back on it thes seems like a profoundly dumb idea--there's plenty of secluded woody spots on Carleton Campus to smoke dope--there's a whole arboretum--why do your illegal activity in the bathroom of the campus center? **Probably (hopefully) not. Standup Falldowns are frozen lemonade with almost enough water and lots of cheap vodka.